Elkan's Blessing

'Today in school, I decided to keep an eye open for someone I can bless to "fulfill my quota". Haha, almost like a financial planner or an MLM marketeer :p

It came almost like a surprise to me, when one of my colleagues, a fellow "school experiencer" (a trainee teacher on the same programme as me), came back into the staff room, very flustered and looking very weary and burdened.

"Have lunch together?"

"Erm. Ok."

Well, inwardly I was feeling quite stand-offish. I havent really talked much to him before this. He doesnt FEEL like the kind of person I would like to be friends with, or hang out with, much less bless. Always looked kind of stucked up or smart aleck-ish.

So over the course of the lunch, we talked. Surprisingly, contrary to my prejudices, I found him to be quite approachable.

I learnt that he was weary because he was juggling many CCA and commitments outside. I offered my 2-cents worth of transitioning to work life and establishing priorities.

Talked about BGR and how he's going to propose to his girlfriend of 5 years. The girl is 2 years older than him (27 this year). Encouraged him to not dilly dally as the girl shouldnt wait much longer biologically.

Also, I told him the dangers of a long courtship. He agreed and revealed that they broke up once because they once mutually felt "the love was gone". I encouraged him that love needs deliberate effort to keep the fire going, and how in my community service I used to work in, we had a family department which runs marriage encounters so that married couples can learn to "woo" each other again.

Then we talked families and how he's working hard to support his family, yet he felt it was only a duty and he cant feel the appreciation or closeness with his parents.

Etc and so on.

We finished lunch and were preparing to go back for our lessons.

Then I got a prompting.
"Yes, it's a good time getting to know him.
What stops you from blessing him?"

Suddenly it struck me that while I can be
1) A patient and approachable person
2) A sympathetic ear or a good shoulder to cry on
3) An unsolicited advisor or problem-solver,

I can be so indifferent in my heart to all the difficulties he is sharing that I didnt offer him the real deal that can truly help him.
Not my presence.
Not my comfort.
Not my intelligence.
But my prayers to God.

So I took the next minute to explain to him the 12 blessings he can ask God for, and told him I will pray for him without strings attached for the next 1 month. He was almost shocked that I would do that.

"But I am a free-thinker. I wont go to church with you..."
"Doesnt matter. I believe God will hear your prayers irregardless."

On reflection, it was especially humbling for me to realise the state of my heart, how I can reduce people in their worth, by judging them through "coloured lens" of misperception.

Matthew 5:41
If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.

So, let me learn to go the extra mile for you. :) I will be refreshed.


Elkan Lam